One of our significant impediments as human beings is that we assume too much, most of the time, without any factual basis. However, our hypotheses may not always hold true, particularly if the basis we are holding upon is not that fair and haven’t been properly proven to be true. In the end, we get hurt because we let ourselves believe something that is false.
As rational beings, we are inclined towards interpreting signals from our surroundings. Sometimes, however, we misunderstand these signals and assume something that is not correct or not likely to happen.
We jump to judgments so fast without even trying to prove the true story behind the signal. In dating, this is fairly true. The other party often feigns the other’s commitment because we have been reading unclear and sometimes unrealistic signals from the other individual.
And then we see that what we think is not so and get our hearts broken. We then blame the other individual for leading us on. The thing is, it is our fault because we hopped to conclusions without asking the other individual.
To dodge being hurt because of false assumptions, we should know the true story or reasons behind the signal before randomly concluding anything, whether it is good or bad. When we like someone, we tend to over-read the signs she or he sends.
However, please note that they are unaware of the signals at times and that they really mean nothing to them. If you have been involved enough in making sure of the fact, you’ll get to know either of two stuff – those signals are empty, and they do not mean anything or that you are genuinely being player upon or led on. In either case, it is good to know earlier instead of leaping to judgments.
Sometimes, though, it is us that is assumed upon us that sometimes led other individuals on. Sometimes, in our desire to properly please everyone, we don’t want to hurt by openly refusing the other person.
However, sometimes, this needs to be done to dodge assumptions and set free expectations. To shun others from being damaged by misunderstanding our commitment, we should set proper expectations for them.
If you don’t mean your relationship to be past friendship, then say so on the very first day. Do not send flags that you want to take your dating beyond friendship. Otherwise, you’ll both get pained, and your former great friendship will get lost.
Although he might get damaged by the honesty and won’t speak to you for a time, he will thank you for your frankness someday and grow a sense of respect. He will trust you more because of that honesty.
Moreover, it is better, to be honest, get hurt now, and heal sooner instead of being led on. It hurts more because the other person has lost his trust in you.
A lot of people get hurt by assumptions, including us. So do not be over-intelligent and assume everything and be intelligent enough to set free expectations so others won’t jump to conclusions.