Couples are always arguing about money and sex since the beginning of time, and you will hear them telling you those are the two main things they quarrel about. However, there are some other things that couples do argue about at this age. These can be things like how to go to parties, using social media, and even how to make use of each other’s free time.
But what one must know is that even the happiest couples have something to argue about, so it is not even what you argue about but how you can go about the argument. The level of happiness of a couple depends on their ability to resolve their conflicts and bounce back.
Even though money and sex are the most prominent issues that couples get angry at each other for, there are also other things like disliking each other’s friends, coping with the family members of the others, erotic jealousy, and of course, raising children. It will interest you to also know that one of the most regular things a couple of clashes about is household chores. This can sound like an unimportant thing, but it is the cause of most fights in marriages.
Researchers have made us understand that males get a lot more sexual intimacy when they assist their wives with the household chores like cleaning the dishes. A particular study revealed that couples that have the man helping with the house chores have a higher level of sexual satisfaction. The evolution of humans shows that cavewoman females were always excited sexually when they saw their men doing the house chores. Modern science has also shown that heterosexual women find it extremely cute when men help with the chores.
Arguments Are Not Always Bad
Psychiatrists that have studied married couples for decades have concluded that arguments are not necessarily a bad thing. Arguments can be very constructive and can even strengthen the marriage if such misunderstandings are handled with maturity. Couples that have issues are those who are not able to make the best of their arguments.
Stage of Infatuation
This is a phase where the couples believe their partner is amazing and they avoid saying anything nasty or all kinds of arguments. Scientists state that the main reason couples avoid hurting each other during this phase is that they simply do not want to damage their perspective of the other person. This has its downside because it can even lead to more discord in the marriage and can worsen things if not handled with maturity.
The most effective way to get conflicts resolved is to confront the matter and do the discussion – without you shouting at one another. It is not uncommon to see couples avoiding sex and all forms of intimacy because both are angry at each other. If you have something that is bothering you relating to your sexual life, you can raise the matter gently and kindly, without making your partner feel bad or overwhelmed with shame.
To illustrate, if you are married to a husband who has premature ejaculation, you do not have to make any fun of him or talk to him in a way that he is going to be embarrassed. You can talk in the most positive and uplifting ways. This is soothing for your partner and allows the couple to talk about how to get solutions to any issue plaguing the marriage.
If you are also having issues regarding the way money is being spent, it can also be resolved with maturity. It is not unusual to see a marriage in which one partner spends way too much money while the other is more conscious of savings. This often leads to major arguments and there will be no resolution until they address the issue. Couples argue most about money and sex but there are a host of other divisive issues too – as outlined above.