One of the biggest challenges that anyone can face in life is the loss of a spouse. The emotional devastation is always there, irrespective of how the partner died. You can imagine being happily married one day and the following day, you are all alone, empty, single, and in mourning.
The person closest to you is gone, and life may even lose its meaning. You go through severe psychological swings, and even your lifestyle can be altered. You can feel depressed, lose appetite, get anxious, or continue crying nonstop. It is not an easy thing to lose a spouse.
With time, the grief will evaporate gradually, and you will have to rebuild your life. Even though this transition is not easy, there are tips that you can use to assist you to cope with it all. If you have lost your spouse to the cold hands of death, here are tips that you can make use of.
Do Not Be Too Hard on Yourself
It can be unbelievably hard to feel good following the demise of your lover and soul mate. There are a lot of factors that will influence your reaction. This includes the length of your marriage and how joyful you were as a couple, circumstances surrounding the death of your lover, the age of your children if you had any together, and the depth of love you shared.
You can feel terrible, shocked, shattered, or just totally blank. You can even feel some guilt for remaining alive, or if your spouse suffered from an excruciating terminal disease, you could feel some relief that he or she is no longer in a state of suffering. Some people even feel furious at their lover for leaving them alone and cold. Many others will cry, and some others will have dry eyes – grief is a very personal thing.
Get ready for friends or relatives who may be too stunned to say a word; some will even be so heartbroken that they will stay away from you or some others who will try to comfort you using the regular lines. Some have your best interest at heart, but they will not even know how to communicate it to you – do not take it personally.
Whatever the kind of reaction you are facing, take it easy, which benefits your health status. Do not beat yourself up, take it in good stride and you will be grounded in reality. To make this easy for you, try and focus on the good times you had together and meditate whenever you can.
Do Not Neglect Your Physical Health
You can forget to take outstanding care of your body when you are in the mourning period, the same way you can forget your mental and psychological health too. You can lose your appetite totally, and sleep may be challenging.
Even though it is not an easy thing to do, you have to make sure that you do not neglect your physical health. You have to try your best to feed well, do your exercise and get adequate sleep. Do not attempt to forget the bitter sorrow by indulging in alcohol, which will only make things a lot worse.
It is of extreme importance that you take very good care of yourself at this time. Researchers have discovered that the risk of death for you as the surviving spouse increases dramatically in the first 90 days of the loss. So, as you can see, you have to take proper care of yourself for your own sake. If you cannot cope with the regular daily activities like cooking or even dressing or making your hair, reach out to healthcare professionals.
It can be truly overwhelming for you in several ways when you lose your partner. It is even normal in many instances to experience depression. It is truly a big hit emotionally and studies have shown a spike in several psychiatric conditions following a spouse’s death.
Scientists have noticed that not getting enough social support following such a huge loss triggers depression. Hence, you must get help from people. Even though the normal reaction may be for you to withdraw and stay alone, you should resist that feeling and get the much-needed help from other people.
You can draw on support from your children, siblings, family relatives, clerics or counselors and other health professionals. If you are actively trying to cope with depression, reach out to the mental health centers in your place, and get professional treatment. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking this step.
Another option for you is to become a support group member made for other people who are also coping with grief. You can learn about these support groups from your regional hospital, doctor or healthcare provider.
Modify Your Social Life
Now that you are single, your social life is going to have a dramatic change. If you always attended outings with your late spouse, things will be very different for you now. You can feel weird attending parties or even feel out of line going to occasions all alone.
You need to open up to your friends and let them know precisely how you feel and why you may not be able to attend some of the events designed for couples alone. The good thing about it all is that your new status as a single person can now help you make new friends.
Join volunteer groups and classes to ensure that you do not spend all your time indoors and alone. Going out and mingling with others mean you will be able to redirect your energy to activities that will give you a lot of meaning and a sense of purpose. Using these tips will allow you to grieve properly and transition into a new phase of life without any lasting damage to your health.