In modern relationships, there comes a day when one or both of the partners craves some time and space away from each other. Some individuals may see this as a red flag and quickly jump to conclude that the person wanting room no longer loves them or is already looking elsewhere. This may not indeed, be the case. If you are in a coping relationship and have trouble solving your issues, taking a break from a relationship can be a way to unblock your mind and get a better prospect on the situation. When you live and talk with a person daily, it can be challenging to take the time to do the “self-work” you need to do to repair the relationship.
Here are three rules for taking a break:
Know Why You Need a Break: Do some self-analysis to examine why you need a relationship break. Are you feeling like your love is lacking enthusiasm? Are you kicking a new stage in your life (going to college/moving for work) that has you believing you may not work together long-term?
Discuss the Break in Person: Since a break from your love involves both comrades, the talk about taking on one should, too. This should take place in person and not on a phone call/message. That way, you’ll be able to understand body language and signals you usually won’t get over the phone.
Set Important Rules: Break doesn’t mostly mean exploring your sexual desires on dating apps. Break up if you want that. Be as straightforward as possible. Bring up the idea to have the break, how often (or if) you’ll talk to each other, and whether you’ll meet and go on a blind date with other people during this time. Think throughout before starting the ‘break time.’ If you lose your partner to someone else, he/she might never come back.
Taking a Break in 2020 (Pandemic Era)
One of the most significant issues with relationships during the current COVID-19 Era is that the recent struggles with job, time, and life is speeding and hardening the intensity of love. 2020 relationships are accelerating rather quickly in the start with both parties finding peace and happiness in each other. Once you develop that deep connection, it’s like the entire world stops breathing, and you can only see each other. You stop hanging out with your friends (which you can’t due to pandemic), your daily schedule changes, and all you can think about is this beautiful partner that’s come into your life. Well, as time passes and the love begins to develop and evolve, one or both of the partners may start to realize that they have lost some of their individuality and wish to regain it. If you feel the need to rediscover your self, the key is openly expressing your spouse’s needs. This may be a hard conversation because many individuals become naturally fearful anytime someone brings up needing space in a relationship.
There are several ways that you can take a break without “breaking up.” Taking a break may mean simply changing your routine and not spending every waking moment together. Take a week off, take a fishing trip with your buddies, or travel to a resort with your girlfriends. There is a certainty to the old saying that “absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
A couple I know preserved their relationship by one of them taking a position at a job requiring monthly travel. They reported the time apart as an excuse to rediscover the feeling of missing and longing for each other, which added a much-needed spark to their relationship. Be imaginative in how you find ways to give yourself time and space to care for yourself.
If we know how to take better care of ourselves, we will eventually be better partners.
